Category Archives: Beef

Flank Steak Roulade

My peoples, I want to introduce you to my very dear friend. He never fails to impress and everyone wants a piece of him. His style is minimalist yet refined. He smells great and tastes even better, er…OK, enough with the analogy. Flank Steak Roulade is a game changer. It lets you bring the wow factor to the table without being downright arduous. Furthermore, it lends itself perfectly to a culinary imagination since it can be filled with anything that pairs well with steak…blue cheese and bacon; spinach, mushroom, and Swiss…I can go on and on, so I’ll just give you tools to create this roulade and leave the creativity to you. This dish is deceptively easy and once you get the hang of butterflying and tying you will be stuffing flank steaks for every occasion.

  • Serves: 6
  • Prep time: 25mins (this really depends on skill level)
  • Cook time: ~30mins (includes sear and oven time for medium rare)
  • Total: Let’s say an hour give or take

Get yourself:

  • 1 2lb flank steak
  • 1C Asiago grated
  • 1C Sharp Provolone grated
  • .5C Pecorino Romano grated
  • .5 C Seasoned bread crumbs
  • 1T Pesto (You can just chiffonade some basil if that’s easier for you; about 2T)
  • 1 Clove fresh garlic
  • 1-2 Cloves roasted garlic
  • 2T Fresh parsley
  • 2T olive oil
  • s&cracked pep
  • Kitchen twine
  • A good fillet knife
  • A digital meat thermometer
  • Meat mallet
  • Frying pan to sear the roulade
  • Baking dish

Let’s do this!

First things first preheat your oven to 375F

Gather your tools

Get your steak ready

Rinse and pat dry

Trim some of the fat off of both sides

Now it’s time to butterfly this bad boy…

Who’s coming with me?!


Start with the flank steak perpendicular to you and with the thicker side to the left

Press your hand firmly on top of the flank

Pierce the top of the beef and carefully slice downwards

Use your hand as a guide to feel the knife as you slice downwards

At first I only slice a couple of inches into the flank

I repeat these steps until I’ve sliced deep into the flank and it begins to open up

Slice through carefully and the steak will open up like a book

Press down along the center, if it seems too thick then carefully slice to thin it out

If the entire steak is too thick then pound it to 1/4″ thickness with mallet

Guess what homie…

You just butterflied yourself a flank steak!


Time for a little massage…

Smash a fresh clove of garlic so it splits open

Rub the garlic on the inside of the beef for flavor

If you don’t have roasted garlic then rub fresh garlic on inside and outside

Otherwise, rub roasted garlic on outside of beef

Fresh in – Roasted out

Grab some of that flavor packin’ pesto and smear it all around

Cover entire surface area

Shred yourself a nice mountain of both cheeses and mix together

Go ahead, eat some…I know you want to.

You ready to stuff, roll, and tie like a champ?!

Spread on the cheese, sprinkle on the breadcrumbs and parsley (or basil if you opted for that)

Crack some pepper on top

Don’t forget the Pecorino Romano!

With the steak long ways, roll up like a jelly roll

Some of the stuffing will try to escape, just stick it back in

Lay roulade seam side down facing long ways

Cut yourself a few feet of butchers twine (better to have more than less)

Tie a knot at the top of the roll

Hold string in left hand and with your right hand slide string under roll

In your left hand you’ll have a loop and the remainder of the string in your right

Take the string in your right hand and feed it through the loop in your left

Pull the string in your right hand down towards the beef to tighten the knot

If the knot is off-center just gently shift the string and re-tighten

Follow the same loop and pull technique down the length of the roulade

Tie off the end with a strong knot

Rub some olive oil, salt, and pepper on the surface

Heat up a frying pan with the 2T of oil

Once the oil starts to smoke quickly add the roulade and sear

You should have a nice dark brown sear all around

Pop the roulade into a baking dish and into the oven

If you have a meat thermometer, pierce it into center of roulade

It’s perfectly cooked to medium rare when internal temp is 140F, ~30mins

Remove from oven and put a foil tent over roulade for 5mins…

this allows the juices to redistribute

(Sorry no pics of this process, but it’s straightforward)

When roulade is done resting…

Snip the long piece of string running the length of the roulade

Slice the roulade into 1.5″ thick portions with twine still wrapped around so it stays together

Bad ass, oozy, cheesy, juicy, tender, flavor packin’ pinwheels

Add the pinwheels back to the baking dish with all of the juices

Ohhh’s & Ahhh’s:

“I feel like I’m eating the greatest meatball evah!”

“OMG, this is so good!”

“Dude, what the heck this is ridiculously delicious!”

“Joe, you Tony Tigered this %&!*, it’s Greeeeat!”

Go make this ASAP. They will nominate you for a James Beard

Thank me later…


  • Bacon and blue cheese
  • Spinach, mushroom, and Gruyère
  • Provolone, peppers, and onions
  • Slice the roulade into pinwheels before cooking and throw them on the grill
  • Marinate the flank in your favorite marinade then stuff


Beef Fah-jee-tas!

Spicy and tender strips of beef, peppers & onions, melted cheddar, and a dollop of sour cream all  rolled up in a warm stone ground tortilla…muy caliente!

Serves 4

Ready in 15mins

Get yourself:

1 Skirt steak cut into strips

4 bell peppers mixed colors

1 Vidalia onion sliced

4T Avocado or Vegetable oil

1T Dried oregano

1.5t Garlic powder

1.5t Seasoned salt

1t Smoked Paprika

1t Chili powder

1t Cumin

.5t Crushed cayenne powder

s&p to taste

Wok pot or something that can handle high heat well

(p.s. click on pics to enlarge and see more detail)

Preheat wok for about 10mins over high heat

Cut up peppers and onions into strips

Toss with s&p, oregano, and 1T oil

Add to wok

They will hiss

Let them cook for about a min and then toss

When you get char marks and peppers & onions are softened you’re good to go

Toss into a glass bowl and prep your beef

Toss beef with oil and dry spices

Add to wok and sear meat for about a min

Flip and finish cooking meat

Shred a mountain of cheese

You can never have too much shredded sharp cheddar

Brush a little oil on a corn tortilla and heat in a non-stick pan until toasty

Spread a little sour cream on tortilla, sprinkle some cheese around and top with hot fajita mix

Top it off with a little more cheese, maybe some salsa or avocado…whatever floats your boat

Me, I like to make Spanish rice with this and stuff some rice in there

Roll up, realize you overstuffed, lift towards mouth and hope the goodness doesn’t fall out the back, take a huge bite…

Make 4 more

Sip some ice-cold cerveza


(Post) Valentine’s Day

Valentine’s Day Objectives: RELAX and EAT.

…and so we did…all day.

We decided to kick things off with leftover cinnamon rolls from the Pioneer Woman (wifey froze half of the disturbingly delicious cinnamon roll dough from last time). Perfect.

And so the deliberate yet destructive eating began…

Our next venture was Oreo cookies…homemade, super chocolate-y, creamy, straight up milk dunkin’ OREO’s!…yea that’s right I made ’em and even colored the center…pause. Thanks to a little inspiration from Smitten Kitchen, I whipped up a big batch of V-day O’s, all pun intended…

The day turned to night…

We started dinner off with a lite, weight watchers friendly appetizer…

Swiss fondue with homemade bread

Take bread, dip repeatedly in warm, melty, gooey cheese. groan.


Note: Use a fondue pot if you have one. I battled it out with the cheese in this sauce pot for a good 20mins. You see, stainless steel pots heat too quickly and if the cheese gets too hot too fast it seizes up. I had to beat the seize outta my cheese. Here’s the recipe (click the pic to enlarge)…

Needless to say, dinner did not come immediately after. As a matter of fact, we both fell into a deep food coma and woke up an hour later. Of course I get blamed…

“Why’d you let me sleep that long?!”

“I didn’t let you, I was sleeping myself.”

“But, I thought you were cooking dinner?!”

“Are you seriously hungry after we just inhaled a pound of melted cheese and a loaf of bread?!”

“Well, I’m not starving…but we have to eat dinner.”

“We’ll eat later, in the meantime let’s drink.”

Drink of the night….

Chocolate Covered Cherry Martini

This seriously tastes like a chocolate covered cherry…got wasted

Get yourself: 2oz Chocolate vodka, 20z Black Cherry vodka, 2oz half and half, 2oz simple syrup, 6t Maraschino cherry juice + 4 cherries, 1T Ghiradelli Double Chocolate-Hot Cocoa mix, Chocolate syrup.

To make: Combine all your liquids into a shaker over ice and shake. Line rim of glass with chocolate syrup. Place cherries at bottom of glass. Pour drink in. Dust top of drink by putting cocoa powder in a sieve and tapping it. Sit down. If standing, grab hold of something stable such as a counter top or banister or such as…drink, enjoy, thank me later.

Okay, now that we’re feelin’ loose…let’s, uh, cook dinner?


Sherry Baby Bella’s

Roasted Garlic and Parmesan (s)mashed Potatoes

Porterhouse for Two — Ruth’s Chris style

I wanted some classic sides to go with the 2.5lb hunk of beast I was serving so I thought sautéed mushrooms and mashed potatoes would be perfect. Then I thought, that’s boring.  So I tweaked them a little and now, lucky me, I can never go back to the classic way because it just pales in comparison.

Sherry Baby Bella’s

These mushrooms are bangin’!

Get yourself: 1 shallot, 5T butter, 2T extra virgin, 6 cloves roasted garlic mash, 2 packages of sliced baby bella’s, 1/4 cup dry sherry cooking wine, salt and cracked black pepper, 1T fresh chopped parsley

To make: In a skillet over medium flame heat up your 3T butter and 1T of oil. When butter foam subsides toss in your roasted garlic mash and stir to break up. Then add your shallots and cook for 5 mins until soft and starting to brown. Now toss in 1T of butter, let it melt, and then add the mushrooms. Toss to coat. Let mushrooms cook down a bit and get nice and soft. Now, raise the flame to high, add in your sherry wine and cook for a few mins scraping bottom of pan to deglaze. Reduce flame to medium and stir all together.Continue to cook mushrooms, they should be shrunken and slightly browned at this point. Add your last T of butter and olive oil. This will create a buttery, and velvety sauce for the mushrooms. Kill the flame. Toss in your parsley. Put the fork down.

Roasted Garlic and Parmesan (s)mashed Potatoes

This recipe yields a batch of (s)mashed potatoes like no other. There’s a hint of roasted garlic and Parmesan and the texture is silky smooth. Roughly mashing the potatoes leaves some chunks of potato and skin which gives the dish  contrasting textures.

Get yourself: 3lbs new baby red potatoes, 1 cup heavy cream, 2T butter, 6-8 cloves roasted garlic mash, 1T extra virgin, 3 handfuls of grated Parmesan, salt&cracked pepper.

First things first, cook your potatoes until fork tender. I like to throw mine in a huge Pyrex bowl, add 1/4 cup of water to the bowl, cover, and heat in microwave for 6-8 mins/lb. They will pierce easily with a fork. Dump any remaining water from the bowl and smash the potatoes.

Leave it chunky (it’ll break down when you stir later). In a large pot heat your butter and roasted garlic mash. When foam subsides on butter add the heavy cream, black pepper and Parmesan. Stir to make saucy. Toss in your potato mash and stir until the potatoes are somewhat creamy and take on a sheen.

I’m warning you may be tempted to eat half before it even gets to the plate!

Now, Ladies and Gentlemen, the moment you’ve all been waiting for…our headliner this evening….

weighing in @ 2.5lb and measuring 2″ thick…

Porterhouse (for 2)

Get yourself: a big slab of Porterhouse beef (I put in a special request at the local butcher), 2T butter, 1T fresh parsley, oven-safe serving platter, s&cracked pepper.

Can’t picture a 2.5lb porterhouse, see for yourself…

To make: All it takes to cook this is a quick sear ea. side over high heat and then it gets finished in the oven. First you will take the meat out at least 15mins before cooking so it gets to room temp. Preheat oven to 450F. Next, liberally salt and pepper the beef.  Heat a cast iron skillet grill pan until smoking hot. Sear the steak on one side for ~3mins then flip. Place 1T of butter on top of beef. Place skillet in middle of oven and check for doneness after 8-10mins. Once beef is done, put 1T butter on oven-safe platter and put under broiler for a few mins (watch that butter doesn’t burn). Take out and sprinkle with parsley.  Then place meat on platter and carve.

Make sure you have your stove exhaust on high bc this steak will hiss and smoke like crazy!

And there you have it…

be VERY careful, the plate is hot!

Texas Gravy

A ubiquitous dish steeped in tradition. Although modern, overcomplicated, and pretentious versions have pervaded kitchens everywhere it’s OK. Why? Well, because Chili is that dish that lends itself perfectly to personalization. It’s a great dish, but like an Italian and Sunday Gravy, chili often becomes the victim of harsh judgment since almost everyone has a chili reference they compare to or certain chili rules like no beans or must use dried whole chili peppers which are first toasted then ground to a powder. This is limiting, but for those like me, chili is an art form open to interpretation so no true version should exist. I mean rules are meant to be broken, right? So let’s stop yearning for the perfect and best of everything and just eat!

With that said…

You will need:

2lbs 85% lean ground beef @ room temp

10 Slices hickory smoked bacon cut in 1/4’s

4 Sweet bell peppers – mixed colors (GYRO)

2 Vidalia Onions – chopped

4 Cloves fresh garlic

4 Cloves roasted garlic mash (~1T)

2T Dried Greek oregano

2t Kosher salt/1t crushed black pepper

1T Rendered duck lard

2T Soy sauce (Don’t forget about the Umami dimension of flavor)

4T Worchestire

1 Lager beer (I used Dos Equis)

1 28oz can diced tomatoes (I used Tuttarusso)

2 Cans Red Kidney beans (optional)

Chili Powder Mix:

4T Chili powder

3T Smoked paprika

1T Ancho chili powder

1T Cocoa chili powder

1T Garlic powder

2T Liquid Smoke

4t Garam Masala (Secret ingredient)

2t Cumin

1.5t Chipotle powder

Let’s Make Some Texas Gravy!

Ok, first things first, heat up that duck fat

Believe me, it’s worth it

Brown your beef. Be careful you don’t kill it

As soon as it’s uniformly brown kill the flame and set aside

Should look like this…Cover, we’ll come back to this in a bit

Bacon baby!

Grab ~10 slices and quarter

Fry in a heavy bottom pot

Preferably in the same pot you’re cooking the chili

Get it going, try to separate the chunks so they cook evenly

Goal is to get nice crispy pieces that will hold up in the chili

Reserve about 2T of that fat for sautéing veggies

Once crisp, toss on paper towels to absorb some oil

Heat the bacon fat over medium-high heat

Toss in your chopped onions

Cook for ~5mins

Add the chopped garlic and roasted garlic mash

Stir to combine

Careful, you don’t wanna you know what…

Dice up your bells

Toss into the onions and garlic, along with the bacon and stir

Grab dos dos equis –  they don’t call it dos for nothing

One for you, one for chili

Dump it in and bring to a boil for ~5mins

Drop to simmer and prep your spice mix

Time to spice things up a bit…

Grab all of your dry spices and herbs

Add to a bowl big enough to stir

Add your ground beef to the pot and then toss in the spices

Mix really well

Where there’s smoke there’s flavor!

Add to pot and stir

Add your tomatoes and stir it all together

A voice in the distance, starting to smell good in here!

Thanks babe

I hope it’s not to spicy for me though

Uhh…sure babe I made it just right no worries…

Ok good, because you know how much I hate spicy

It’s chili for crissakes not a Bolognese!

Cover and let it simmer for ~1hr

Take a peek…

Once I feel it’s done I let it cool and refrigerate overnight

I know you can’t believe I’m not eating it right away, but honestly…

I think it tastes better the next day

When it’s time to serve, heat as much as you want in a sauce pot

Toss in a handful of shredded sharp cheddar and white American (trick I got from craftsteak in NYC)

Stir until melted

I serve my chili with some white rice

Go make some if you’re into that

Fill up an oven-safe bowl or mug and top it with shredded cheddar or your cheese of choice

Put under broiler for ~2mins until browned and bubbly

Some Tostito scoops, dollop of sour cream, sliced pickled jalapeno, onion rings…

Toppings are endless

It’s a little spicy, don’t cry about it you’re eating chili…

Man up!